Sometimes the Truth Hurts
by DramaQueen5
Summary: Carter's turn to muse about the return of Susan Lewis and its effects on him and a certain someone . . .
1. Default Chapter

Sometimes the Truth Hurts  
  
Wrote this along time ago. Right after "Never Say Never," in fact, but never got around to posting it. It's angsty with a Carby twist so Carsans, Lubys, Jinters, etc. will want to skip this one. It starts out w/individual Abby and Carter angst, but I promise there will be more Carby interaction soon! As usual these people do not belong to me, they are the property of all those Hollywood bigshots like John Wells, and Michael C., and Warner Bros.  
  
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Abby entered her apartment, heading straight for the kitchen, leaving a trail of keys, jacket, and backpack behind her. She was hungry and cold. Now with a hot cup of coffee in her hands and dinner in the microwave, Abby sat down at her little kitchen table to ponder the days events. "That Susan Lewis has a real pole up her ass," Abby thought. She laughed at her immature reaction to this new doctor, but then again Dr. Lewis has spent the entire day making her miserable and it wasn't just her rudeness that had set Abby off. It was something else, something Abby couldn't quite put her finger on. *Beep, Beep, Beep* The timer reminding Abby that her dinner was ready broke her reverie and Abby rose to take her leftover macaroni out of the microwave.  
  
"Note to self, go to the grocery store tomorrow," Abby said as she surveyed her pathetic stock of food to go with her leftovers. Settling on carrot sticks, Abby sat down again, content with her food and the mail to sift through. The blissful silence was once again interrupted, this time by the phone ringing. Abby sighed as she reached for the phone.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Abby? *a pause* It's Luka."  
  
Abby rolled her eyes, he was probably going to complain some more about his dead fish.  
  
"Look Luka, I already told you that I would buy you two new fish."  
  
"I didn't call about the fish, I wanted to tell you that I found that blue sweater of yours in case you were looking for it."  
  
"Oh," Abby hadn't expected this, "Thanks, um, do you want to just bring it to work tomorrow?"  
  
"Yeah," Luka paused, "Look Abby, I'm sorry if I said anything that hurt you that night, but I was just so frustrated."  
  
"It's okay, Luka, I'm sorry too."  
  
"Truce?"  
  
"Truce."  
  
"Great! So now that we can talk to each other again, what did you think of that Dr. Lewis? She made a great pickup on a case we had today and all the nurses really seem to like her."  
  
"Yeah?" Abby replied sarcastically, "Well, this nurse doesn't."  
  
"What? Why not?"  
  
"I don't know, maybe it's the fact that she snapped at me to get my attention, or that she was constantly asking me to do things for her that she was perfectly capable of doing for herself. She's rude, presumptuous, and she's stealing my-" Abby stopped suddenly, surprised by what she had almost said.  
  
"Stealing your what?" Luka pressed.  
  
"Um, it was nothing. Sorry I got a little out of control there, it was just not a great day."  
  
"You want to talk about it?"  
  
"No, that's okay, thanks. Well, I better go, see you tomorrow Luka."  
  
"Wait, Abby-" Luka started, but she had already hung up.  
  
Alone again in her silent apartment, Abby felt the true pain of her day take over her body. The feeling she had felt when she saw Carter and Susan outside holding hand, looking so amiable, made her feel sick to her stomach.  
  
"First she snaps at me, then she asks me to do all her dirty work, and then she steals my-" Abby stopped again. What was Carter?  
  
"Don't be stupid Abby, he's you best friend," she said to herself.  
  
But "best friend" didn't seem to suffice. Carter was the only secure thing (or so she thought) in her whole life. He was always there for her. Hell, he had driven all the way from Oklahoma to Chicago with her and her bipolar mother. He was her other half.  
  
Abby got that sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach again when she thought of how she saw Carter light up when Dr. Lewis was around. Then, Abby got that junior-high, butterflies in her stomach feeling, when she had another realization. She was jealous. Not just because she was losing her best friend, but because the thought of another woman in John's life made her crazy. She knew that their relationship had moved far beyond friendship. She realized that she had to do something before she lost him. He had been waiting for her to come around all summer, always the gentleman, never pushing her. Abby sat alone in her apartment and finally admitted what he had known all along.  
  
"I love him." 


	2. Part 2

Sometimes the Truth Hurts – Part 2  
  
This one takes place after "Quo Vadis" so if you have not yet seen that episode, beware of spoilers! Segments inside the ***** lines indicate a flashback.  
  
As usual, these characters are not mine. They are property of Warner Bros. and Constant C and all those other Hollywood types.  
  
Sometimes the Truth Hurts – Part 2  
  
Carter sighed as he stepped into the large foyer of the Carter family mansion. Days like this made him wish he had a place of his own where he could be completely alone and be able to clear his thoughts. Not to mention a place where he might be able to bring somebody home for some romancing. He smiled as he saw the lilies that Susan had sent Gamma tucked back on a bookcase.  
  
"Well, at least she put them in a vase," John said.  
  
He was at a loss as to what to think about that evening's events. Who would have thought that he, John Carter, the bumbling med student of yore, would ever be kissing Susan Lewis, the resident who had made his days with Dr. Benton bearable and had guided him through his last two years of med school? Since she had come back, Carter now saw her as an equal, rather than his mentor. Although, part of him thought that she still sort of saw him as a kid brother. She had been sort of hesitant about kissing him back. What was he thinking? They already had plans to go out tomorrow since they both had the night off. John whistled a jovial tune as he headed towards his room.  
  
"John, is that you?" John heard as he walked past his grandmother's room.  
  
He stuck his head inside, "Yeah Gamma, did I wake you?"  
  
"Oh no, I've been up." He came in and sat on the edge of her bed.  
  
"You know, you should really get some sleep, you've got a broken hip."  
  
"I know John. I don't need you to remind me of what I already know. Let's just keep it so that you're my grandson and not my doctor."  
  
"Okay, Okay!" John chuckled, knowing he had been beaten. "Listen Gamma, I want you to give Susan a chance. She really wants you to like her and -- "  
  
"John, stop," Gamma cut him off. "I just don't see why she's so desperate for my approval. I don't like it when people suck up to me just for personal gain."  
  
"Gamma, I want you to like her. It's no use for me to try to have some sort of a relationship with her if you don't like her!"  
  
"A relationship? Well, I suppose if you can stand her, I should be able to tolerate her."  
  
"Tolerate her?" John was flabbergasted. "I give up! Good night, Gamma."  
  
"Good night, John," she laughed as he walked out looking so annoyed.  
  
Carter walked the rest of the way to his room, and slammed to door. Gathering himself together, he hit the play button on his answering machine as he began to unbutton his shirt.  
  
"Hello, John? Are you there? Guess not. It's Kerry Weaver. Anyway, I was wondering if you could switch to the night shift on Christmas Eve, you see . . ."  
  
"No way, Kerry," John said to the machine as her message went on. "Find someone else."  
  
" . . . anyway, give me a call or talk to me when you come in tomorrow. These were the extra responsibilities we were talking about that come with being chief resident. See you tomorrow."  
  
"Well, that was a low blow," John muttered as he slipped into his sweat pants.  
  
*Beep*  
  
"Hey, John, this is Tom from AA. Where ya been lately? People've been asking about you at meetings. Anyway, a bunch of us are going to the meeting at St. Luke's Friday night and are then going out for dinner, and we just wanted to see if you could make it. Give me a call, my number's 529-7901. Let me know if you can make it, or just show up at the meeting. Oh, bring your friend Abby too. If you don't mind my saying, she's hot! Or, is she hands off? You two getting a little action? Anyway, give me a call."  
  
*Beep*  
  
Carter stood staring at the answering machine for a minute and then shook his head as he entered the bathroom to wash up.  
  
"Well, Tom, Abby's all yours," He said through a mouth of toothpaste. "I've found somebody better." Or had he?  
  
Back in bed, Carter tried to go to sleep, but to no avail. His back was killing him, and he was plagued with thoughts of Abby.  
  
"God, why can't I get her out of my head?"  
  
Carter's mind slipped back to the real conversation he had had with her.  
  
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"If you want someone with no history you're gonna have to find yourself a virgin!"  
  
"No, I'll settle for somebody who's not hung up over somebody else."  
  
"You don't have to settle for anything, Carter."  
  
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Was he just settling for Susan? Was he just too stubborn to accept Abby on her terms and not his? Was Susan his second choice?  
  
"Of course not," John said to no one in particular.  
  
Then, why did he feel like something was missing from his life these days? Sure, he missed Abby. He missed having somebody to talk to about his problems. Sure, he and Susan had plenty of fun, but could he really talk to her? Even after he told her about the stabbing and the addiction and rehab, she had just brushed it aside as something that was in his past, and joked about his scar. But, it wasn't something in his past. There wasn't a day when he didn't have cravings and think about how easy it would be to just take some Vicodin or Phentonal from the drug lockup. The only person who really seemed to understand this was Abby. Sure, is was mostly because she was also an addict and because she had seen him at his worse, but he and Abby had their fun and their serious moments. Hell, he didn't even know if Susan could take him seriously. She could never even call him John before, and he hadn't heard her call him that yet. Abby sure had a way of messing with his head, even when he hadn't spoken to her in weeks.  
  
"What am I supposed to do?" John suddenly asked. But there was no one to answer him but the darkness.  
  
To be continued . . .  
  
  
  
Part three is soon to come. Let me know what you think!!!! 


End file.
